💔 Inneresting #147 - What we're going to do without love
"We would've been alright if there hadn't been any mess."
What is love?
Baby don’t hurt me
Don’t hurt me
No more– Haddaway
On-screen relationships aren’t all happy endings. Sometimes heartache makes the eventual discovery of love feel that much more powerful. Other times the heartache is the point.
Starting with a primer on breakups, IndieWire’s Playlist staff put together some viewing suggestions for films about crumbling and toxic relationships. Nuha Hassan looks at depictions of divorce in film, starting with the Hays Code censoring realistic depictions of the subject. Hassan’s article digs in to how the lifting of the code lead to films taking a closer look at how marriages and families split apart.
When writing relationships, there’s also the potential danger of crafting something that’s supposed to seem romantic, but misses the mark. Josie Santi rounds up a shortlist of film tropes that are used to bring characters together, but mask problematic relationship ideals.
Looking at the small moments where it all falls apart, pay attention to the details when the author of the blog Unbecoming describes realizing her 20-year marriage to a Marine was over. Also worth reading as a reminder that everybody has their reasons, and one person’s unforgivable sin can be another’s scar they try to ignore to hold things together.
For some specific film examples, start with Therapist Heather Thom analyzing the attachment styles of Joel and Clementine in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind to show how that clash builds to their breakup. Then, Kaleem Hawa on recognizing himself in Conrad Jarret, observing the way that the repression of all the characters in Ordinary People put them on an inevitable course toward the end of a marriage.
I will never forget the scene where Calvin sits at the table in the dining room, and begins to cry after a particularly harsh fight with his wife. Teenage me was shocked, not just because of how rare it was to see male tears on the screen but, I realize now, because of what it portended for his marriage—men only allowing themselves to cry when it’s too late.
—Kaleem Hawa, “Feeling Seen: Ordinary People”
It’s not me, it’s you (joining the Write Sprint)
Even if it feels like you’ve fallen out of love with your work in progress, there’s always a chance to reignite that spark—one sprint at a time.
What’s a Write Sprint?
John wrote up an explanation, but here’s the short version: Set a timer for 60 minutes, close down all distractions, and do nothing but write until that timer goes off.
FYI: You no longer need to use the Substack app to participate in chat! The Write Sprint thread will now open in any browser and allow subscribers to join in.
Shout out to last week’s Sprinters Aimee Link and Idalmiz!
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Previously on Inneresting…
In case you missed it, in last issue’s most clicked link Nathan Go looks to anthropology and personal history to consider how writers need to dig into the mechanics of attraction and romance in the real world before they can depict them.
Other Inneresting Things…
Tim McDonnell investigates the effectiveness of Commons, Sanchali Pal’s app to track and reduce personal carbon emissions.
Rach Smith considers how to find the problems that tickle your brain in just the right way to keep you engaged long enough to improve your skills.
David Moldawer on the importance of preparation for doing your best work: “Preparation is a machine for turning humility into success. This is ironic because success kills humility.”
Reading the room
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And that’s what’s inneresting this week!
Inneresting is edited by Chris Csont, with contributions from readers like you and the entire Quote-Unquote team.
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